by Sahar Foladi
This year’s Walk against Family Violence event sent a bold message – to identify the ‘red flags’ of domestic abuse.
Domestic violence survivor Simone O’Brien, who almost lost her life at the hands of her ex-partner in 2012, was the guest speaker at the Greater Dandenong Council annual event on Tuesday 19 November.
Supporters marched from the Dandenong Market to Harmony Square, where O’Brien addressed the crowd.
An advocate for a decade now, she told Star News that it was an honour for her to be at the event with such a great turnout.
For her, the most rewarding bit was to see “so many people involved in the walk.”
“I get flown internationally and nationally. It’s disappointing when you go to an event and see a handful of people.
“Seeing every seat taken plus more with guests that came out in support of this DV walk – they should be truly proud of themselves.
“As a survivor I was truly blown away to present and let everyone know we’re not alone and we’re a team to make a stance in this crisis.
“It was fantastic to see so many nationalities there as well.”
The annual Walk against FV is one of the most important events on the council calendar, a walk of support for the survivors of family violence and those experiencing it now.
O’Brien shared her story of survival on how it led to her advocacy for survivors, women and children.
Almost beaten to death with a baseball bat, the “ripple effect” on her children has been “unimaginable” she says.
It was her South African neighbour and Samoan neighbours who stepped in to save her life.
“When I was attacked, they put their life on hold and grabbed the perpetrator.
“When I look at anyone I don’t care what they look like, what colour or what language they speak, we have to work as a team.”
As a result of the attack, she has lost sight in her right eye and the sense of smell. Her skull is held together with screws and titanium plates.
O’Brien took the advocacy path after that. In between medical appointments, treatments and operations, she has been empowering women, survivors and children to make a difference.
“It’s getting bigger, people say you’re well known. But it’s just me. I wanted to have a voice for us woman and children to make change.
“We can say ‘no, we can walk around the street – we shouldn’t feel that we can’t.'”
Surprisingly, she also works with perpetrators in and out of jail “making them own it.”
“When I go to schools, I have students saying, ‘thanks for saving my dad’s life, he pleaded guilty and is doing drug rehab.’
“It’s the best feeling, a little win is a big win.”
With her ex-partner, something as little as not being able to take a ‘No’ for an answer would trigger him to leave her with life-long scars
“Any little red flag is a big red flag in domestic violence.
“My determination in life is, we’ve all got nieces, aunties, sisters, daughters and I don’t want this to happen to them. The message is to report, look out for the red flag and let them be accountable for their own actions.”
As she stresses the importance of spotting the red flags, she also says many women don’t take action. They feel too embarrassed and ashamed, with the “different emotions that women go through” as well as the perpetrator not letting them out of sight.
According to the Counting Dead Women in Australia, as of August this year 46 women have been killed at the hands of their partner or ex-partner.
According to Crime Statistics Agency data, reported family violence incidents in Greater Dandenong rose 5.4 per cent in 2022-23.
The highest rating form of abuse was verbal and emotional followed by physical abuse.
The highest recorded offence was the breach of family violence order (1533), family violence common assault (588) and criminal damage (278), with 62.8 per cent of resolved offences resulting in arrests in 2023 and 37 per cent left without arrest.
